Meditation

I had one of those ‘ah-hah!!!’ moments the other day. I’ve been fortunate enough to get to lead a discussion group (notice I didn’t say ‘teach a Bible study’) this past quarter. Our young ladies class has been working through “Knowing God’s Word” in the Women of Faith study guide series and we’ve made it to week 11 out of 12. The study has given us insight into the tools we need to go from merely reading the Bible for completion to actually studying and digging deeper by using cross references, Bible references (like commentaries, dictionaries, and concordances), looking at various translations, reading for context, doing outlines and word studies, and searching for themes.

This week’s lesson was meant to take us from studying to meditating. What is the image you get when you hear the word “meditate.” I picture someone doing Yoga near a mountain stream in the warm sunshine with the scent of fresh flowers and pine needles, head completely cleared of any outside distraction. The word, for me, evokes more of a relaxed, reflective mood than one of intense study. The book had us look at many different verses, mostly in Psalms, that contain the word “meditate” or “meditation.” All of the verses pointed out the great things that can come from meditation (success and prosperity, gaining understanding, outward progress) and how much God is pleased by our meditation.

I decided to take it a step further. With each verse, I looked up the definition or synonyms in Vine’s Expository Dictionary. Here’s a list I compiled for what it means to “meditate”:

Utterance, musing, contemplate, whisper, murmuring,

 prayer, commune, think, consider, judge, complain

None of these sound very passive or restful. They all require action. In fact, I didn’t come across the word reflect or rest. Not exactly the cultural image suggested by the word “meditates.”

Okay then, so how does one meditate? Well, that list is mostly verbs, so that’s a good place to start. The study also had us look up Philippians 4:8 that tells us to think on these: whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, trustworthy, praiseworthy. Now we have a bunch of adjective. [ My mom the English teacher is cringing J.] So I thought, “Okay, we can start putting it all together.”  We can contemplate things that are noble. We can pray about things that are pure. We can muse about things that are lovely and admirable.

The final verse the workbook wanted us to look up was 1^st Timothy 4:15. “Meditate on these things, give yourself entirely to them, that your progress may be evident to all.” This reminded me of a conversation I had with a good running friend of mine. We had decided that if we ran as much as we thought about, read about, or talked (blogged) about running, we would be in great shape! This verse is trying to say the same thing. If we were to be constantly thinking about God’s word, we would be in such awesome shape spiritually that the world couldn’t help but take notice- wouldn’t that be cool?

I wanted to learn a little more. The verse says “meditate on these things” – what things? Back up and read for context.

• Verse 12 gives us the WHAT: in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity
• Verse 12 and 13 gives us the HOW: be an example, give attention to reading, exhorting/edifying, and doctrine
• Verse 14 gives us the DON’T: neglect the gift that is in you
• Verse 15 tells us that meditating on these makes us outwardly spiritually fit.
• But the key is in verse 16. Sixteen gives us the all important WHY: “You will save both yourself and those who hear you.”

What better reason to devote time to meditation than to secure one’s own salvation and that of other believers? In Joshua 1:8, he is told to “This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate in it day and night, that you may observe to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.” Joshua was facing the armies of the Canaanites. We are facing the armies of Satan and the world. Like Joshua, our success will be measured in defeating the enemy, and our prosperity will be reaching the Promised Land. Meditating on God’s Word is the key to obtaining both. 

Heart, Soul, and Mind

I learned the words as a little girl in Sunday School, to the tune of some 50s song (that for the life of me I can’t remember the name of!!). And now I sing it to my son as a lullaby. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind and love all of mankind as your would love yourself.” (Matthew 22:37) I sing the two greatest commands as if they were a children’s silly song. But I remember them, and I have had those words hidden in my heart for the last 30 years.

Recently, I saw the application of these in practice. Or rather, became acutely aware of the lack of them. I think I’ve been noticing it in Bible study for a while but finally put it all together. The command is to love the Lord. How? With all one’s heart and soul and mind. Sounds easy enough, right? Right.

Until you really break it down. Have you ever been sitting in a class and everyone gets in a deep, heated theological, intellectual discussion about some really legalistic issue and you think, “everyone is missing the point.” Do you ever listen to a sermon and get no feeling or emotion behind the scriptures, laid out like cold, hard facts in a court trial? Or conversely, take in a truly heart felt worship experience and inspiring, emotional sermon but in retrospect everything was just kind of loosely based on scriptures? Or shy away from the mention of the Holy Spirit at the risk of being labeled Pentecostal or Charismatic?

Heart. Soul. Mind. The scriptures tell us God intended these three areas to work in concert together. The word AND becomes really important there. You can’t just love God by knowing a lot about him, or feeling your way there, or relying solely on the Spirit. We have to marry the three.

Heart. This one is easy: any emotion you feel towards God, towards another person, towards a situation. And as women, we can totally let them get the best of us. We can be in danger of letting our emotions guide us completely and not rely on the Word of God. There is a lot (a whole lot, I believe) to be said about a woman’s intuition, but there are times when we have to take a step back and ask God to make us neutral and be objective. Men, generally speaking, seem to have the opposite problem, easily ignoring their feelings (or ours) and seeing everything as 100% black and white. Good, but at the same time, isn’t it necessary to open one’s heart in order to have a relationship with God, to not harden it to what He has to reveal to us? Neither situation strikes a good balance. Sadly, I have also witnessed this in church work. Some preachers and congregations seem to make it the focus to make everyone feel good, to not preach the truth in love for fear of hurting someone’s feelings, glossing over or omitting scriptures that might make someone feel uncomfortable, using an emotional situation to pull at the heartstrings or sway someone into a decision (mass church camp baptisms, anyone?). Yes, God is love. But at the same time he is a just God who set in place laws and rules, not to keep us from having fun or living our lives, but to keep up from hurt and pain, because he loves us. It comes full circle.

[Okay, sorry, I’m going out of order, because I want to tie it all up in a nice little package and it all comes together nicer if you talk about heart and mind first]

Mind. The church of Christ is really good at this one. Almost too good. We are known for knowing the scriptures backwards and forwards, for studying, cross-referencing, Bible bowl, Bible challenge. Coming from a Baptist background, I remember being so intimidated when my new found church friends could spout off some obscure scripture from Habakkuk, and I couldn’t remember where that book was in the Old Testament, let alone classify it and tell you what was going on in the history of the Israelites at that time. Please don’t get me wrong, Bible knowledge is uber-important. But being legalistic about them, for just seeing them as fact is where we can get into trouble. Atheists (and Satan for that matter) know what the Bible says. To draw application from them, to allow God to speak to us through scripture, to learn life lessons from them (not just about them), that is the challenge, that is where using the mind and thinking for oneself (with the help of the Holy Spirit) become critical for loving our Almighty God.  Check out the Bereans in Acts 17:11-12. The searched the scriptures daily, it says, but even more than that, they received and believed.

Soul. Ready for this? I broke out the Greek lexicon, because I had a thought and wanted to make sure I wasn’t way off base. The Greek word used here for soul is psyche, defined as “the breath of life”. This is very similar to the definition given for the Greek work pneuma or Spirit, as in, the Holy Spirit.  Ooohh.  Read 1st Corinthians 2:12. “Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might know the things that have been freely given to us by God.”  The only reason we, as Christians, can fully know and love God is because we have the Holy Spirit within our own soul.  The Holy Spirit, that helped write the very Scriptures, is inside each Christian helping them discern the mysteries of the Bible. The reason we are able to understand scripture and see how God is working all things together for our good is because he is living and working in our hearts. This makes recognizing the power of the Spirit an absolutely essential element in our walk with God. Again, sometimes it can be taboo to speak of the Holy Spirit working in our lives, but I think we need to know and to be able recognize when it working

Let’s put it all together.  Have you ever been in a really emotional situation, and suddenly the exact right scripture to bring you peace or calm fears or even to celebrate a victory pops in your head?  John 14:26 says that “The Helper, the Holy Spirit, who the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.  See? Previous study helped you learn it, the Holy Spirit helped you remember it, and emotions helped you truly experience it. Or those times you are completely lost in a passage of Scripture, having a hard time comprehending the words on the page, and an event, conversation or prayer that opens your heart to allow the Holy Spirit to lead you brings clarity? Or maybe you felt the tug of the Holy Spirit guiding you to a particular verse that you were later able to use to ease the pain of a loved one?

The three, heart, soul, and mind, must work in concert to truly allow us to experience God as He was meant to live in our lives. They have to live in a sort of checks and balances system so that one never overpowers the others. And I think that being acutely aware of this triad will help to unlock a deeper understanding of ourselves, of the Scriptures and the Holy Spirit as we learn how to love God more fully. 

Professional Courtesy

Disclaimer: I am not writing this piece because I am looking down on professional or career women as a whole (I am one), nor do I want to discourage women from achieving goals and obtaining success. I want no part of so-called “mommy wars” and I am not starting a SAHM/WAHM/WOHM/FT/PT debate. I simply want to say what I wish someone had said to me 15 years ago.

I am a veterinarian. I spent 8 years in college and professional school. I have worked full time for the past 8 years, working 50+ hours a week and nights and weekends on call. I stay late to return phone calls, finish paperwork and clean up messes. Daily, I help owners make agonizing decisions about how to care for or euthanize their pets. I work with an amazing team of co-workers that I consider family. I have seen some pretty cool stuff and worked in some pretty awful conditions (makes for great stories, right?). I have diagnosed some really rare conditions and am able to do some cool procedures. I love my job, most days. ;)

I was told my whole young adult life that what I was doing was awesome. My friends and family were so proud of me and gave me the encouragement I needed to make it through vet school. Along the way, I made some of the best friends I could ever imagine. I was encouraged that all of my hard work in school would pay off, I’d have this awesome job, and that life would be great. The expense of school was to be considered and investment in my future that I’d be able to pay off easily. No worries. I invested much more than money into who I am today.

All of this enthusiasm was great. When I felt down, I could always find someone to lift me up and remind me about my goals. Even now, I am met with nothing but reassurance. But looking back, there was one thing no one ever told me, something I never even considered. No one ever stopped me and seriously asked me, “Sara, do you want to get married, do you want to be a mommy someday? Do you want to have a family? Do you want to be there for your family?” These things were the farthest from my mind when I was in school. I had no prospects for a husband, no time to date or even think about the future, other than that I was going to be a veterinarian. And to be honest, I probably would have said what I’d been conditioned to say. Young ladies are told their whole lives that we can have it all, we can be whatever we want to be, we can do it all. But no one ever mentions that if you have a career, that you will be doing it all- at the same time. In this modern society, where feminism, and multi-tasking, and glass ceilings are common themes, a young girl with professional aspirations is almost ashamed to stop and think, “but how am I going to juggle career and family?” or even to admit that deep down, they really want a husband and babies. Or at least I was.

For intelligent young women, success is measured by how many degrees one obtains, how much status they achieve through their careers, and a yearly salary and benefits. But then you reach the point where you are finished with school, you have a great job, and then…. what? Life begins. You meet an amazing man, fall in love and get married. You adjust and figure out how to both have careers and nurture a marriage. Then along comes a baby or two, and again, you make it work. But later, you lift your head above the mad chaos that has become your life and think, what am I doing? How can this possibly be healthy for me and my family? But by now, life has got you. Your career is taking off, you still need to make enough to make ends meet and pay back the huge school loans you “invested in”, and your babies are growing at warp speed.

Sadly, I think even the church can be involved in pushing women too hard. Exhibit A: the Proverbs 31 woman. She had it all. She did it all. She was all things to all people. And that is the standard that we are given to live up to. And it is intimidating and exhausting to read the list of her attributes: hard worker, early riser, successful business woman, caring employer, blessed mother, trustworthy wife, wise, kind, and well known in the community. She cooks, she weaves and sews, she gives to the needy, and to top it all off, she’s beautiful. Seriously, how does she do it?

I have a (completely theoretical) guess at the answer. It says she does all these things, but it doesn’t say that she did them all at the same time. Ecclesiastes 3 talks about different times in life. I believe that this amazing woman recognized that, in order to excel, that she needed to focus on certain things in different seasons of her life. She gained the respect and trust of her husband early in their marriage. She loved and nurtured her children while they were young and that carried over thought their adult lives. She took care of her household and her servants. Perhaps when the children were a bit older, she became a shrewd business woman and gained recognition in her community. And perhaps in her later years, she was hailed as a precious, beautiful jewel.

At the same time though, I’d like to point out that the Bible says “who can find” such a woman? Maybe we aren’t supposed to be all of these things? Maybe some are meant to gain wealth, some to run a household, some to be benevolent? We are made to be different, and we are called to serve where we are. Maybe being a Proverbs 31 woman means something different to each and every one of us? For some, a distinguished career. For others, being the uber-mom. For most of us, finding a balance between the two. Again, all speculation.

Professional women are often faced with a choice, family or career.  It doesn’t seem like a fair choice, there’s guilt and judgment either way from the SAHM v. WOHM battle lines. And I used to be one of those that looked down on women I knew that “gave up” their career for their families. I remember one instance in particular. I asked my cousin’s wife, who was in PA school at the time, why she didn’t just spend one more year in med school to become a doctor. Her answer: “I want to be a Mommy someday, and I can’t do that and be a doctor”. I thought that was ridiculous. Really, your aspirations in life are revolving around the chance that you might have a family someday? I didn’t realize how wise she really was.

And for that reason, I am going to have a discussion with every young woman I come in contact with that wants to become a vet. We mentor lots of high school, college age, and vet students at my practice, the majority of them female. I’m not going to tell them they need to be stay at home moms, or work part time, or put off having children or going to school. I hope to not really influence their decision to become a professional woman. I just want to plant the seed in their head that a decade from now, they will have other people in their lives and that the career they choose now will affect them greatly. And I’m going to tell them to prayerfully consider their career choice, not just outline the classes, tests, and applications necessary to get into school (again, something that was never mentioned to me). For those that are in vet school already, I’m going to mention to them to make sure there is room in their contracts for maternity leave, extended or family leave, managing their money to go part time if they need to, and being up front with their employers if they intend to have a family.

Again, I know I sound really jaded. I think it comes from my own guilt at having worked my son’s first 3 years of life away and not being there when my husband needs me. And yes, there are times I feel completely selfish for having chosen to borrow so much money for my education that I’ve now placed my family in a situation where I have no choice but to work. But I feel that maybe I can use my experience to help another young woman avoid some of the heartache I’ve experienced these past few years. At least I’ll put the idea in her head that yes, you can have it all, but do you really want it all at the same time?