Family

The other night, we were eating at a restruant and prayed before our meal, as we always do. The guy that was sitting at the next table came over to us on his way out and told us how encouraged he was to see us praying in public, that he'd been watching every other table in the place and no one else had prayed, and to keep up the good work. He complimented us further saying that it was so nice to see such a "young family" showing such a commitment to God.

It was a very very nice moment, one I will probably remember for a long time. Not only did we edify him, but he reassured us that we were doing what was right. It just made me sit there and quietly smile to myself and say "aww..." Then i realized he had called us a "family".

I never thought of Scott and I as a "family". We are definately a couple, but the word family seems reserved for those with children, or with your parents and grandparents, aunts, cousins and so on. It made the fact that we are married and are a family sink in even deeper. We are each other's primary family now. Not our parents, not our siblings. Scott and I. The weight and depth of that thought just makes the rest of my mind stop. My heart is happy and overwhelmed all at the same time.

This concept comes at a very opportune time. I have been apprehesive about this Christmas season: my first on call, my first away from home, and my first with Scott's family. BUT my first with Scott. Exciting, yet so weird. I have no idea what is going to happen, what traditions we'll start, if any, what moments we'll share together.

But to realize that I am with my family, the only family I really need. Scott, the love of my life, the man I love with all my heart.

Dairy Life

Here's a run-down of our day:

Scott gets up anywhere from 5 am to 6:30 am and goes to work
I get up around 7 am and go to work
I get home around 5:30-6 most nights
On call nights I can get called out at any time
I fix dinner and usually have it ready when Scott gets home
Scott gets home anywhere from 6:30 pm to 8 pm
We go to bed 10 to 11 ish
We get up and do it again
Every day....

Sometimes, somewhere in there we can carve out a few minutes to eat lunch together, take a nap together, go to church together, run to Wal-Mart or, on a good day, run to Decatur or Wichita Falls. Usually, however, these moments are cut short or delayed by having to put out hay or grain or go see a sick animal.

I was told numerous times that marriage is hard. I think that the nature of our jobs adds another layer of difficulty in that we can very rarely plan anything. And our jobs are hard. Scott does physical labor all day every day. My days vary from physically, emotionally, and intellectually exhausting.

There's never a day when I can look forward to both of us being off. There is never an end to the responsibility (unless we go out of town). We'll never have a lazy weekend at home, no family holiday morning where we wake up and just be together, not even a relaxing Sunday. Scott has been around this his whole life- I'm very very new at it. I suppose any kind of farm life is like this, but dairy cows demand a lot of time and attention, twice a day.

I think it takes a special kind of woman to be a dairyman's wife. I'm still proving to myself that I'm that woman. Scott thinks I'm doing fine- but I'm always my worst critic. It's this game of trying to be patient and waiting all day to see him and get to spend time with him and then trying to combat the disappointment when he gets in late or has to run an errand or is too tired to do much more than watch TV.

This is what marriage is all about: learning each other, finding patience when you think you don't have any left, and remembering why and how much you love each other.

10 Things....

Top 10 things I love about being married:

1. Getting to share (almost) every evening with Scott.

2. My goodmorning/goodbye kiss- and then rolling back over to sleep for another hour!

3. My goodnight kiss.

4. Having someone to cook for, go to the store with, watch TV with, and so on and so forth.

5. Waiting for my husband to get home- that impatient anticipation- and then him actually getting home!

6. Making a home with someone.

7. Knowing that our choice to marry was according to God's will.

8. Learning how to be married and what submission is really about.

9. Learning what really matters.

10. Loving and being loved.

Top 10 reasons Scott is the man for me:

1. He can use the words "abomasum," "DCAD", and "colostrum" properly in a sentence, all over a dinner conversation.

2. He never minds when I'm covered in some animal something because he's already changed clothes three times that day for the same reason.

3. He rarely minds the long hours I put in because his are, for the most part, even longer.

4. He loves me with all his heart- but he loves God more.

5. He is very black and white when it comes to the grey areas in life.

6. He loves my family simply because they are a part of me.

7. He enjoys the simple things in life as much as I do.

8. He puts his heart into everything he does.

9. He has a child-like, honery, fun-loving spirit.

10. Free Milk!!!!

A close call....

Sara: "Sorry we got here 3 1/2 hours late"
Vanessa: "You got here."

In true Holloway fashion, Scott and I arrived to my cousin's house late. This time, however, it wasn't our fault. We were in a wreck. A guy in a red Ford F-150 single cab pickup tried to attempt a U-turn from our shoulder and pulled out in front of us on the highway. Scott slammed on the brakes, swerved into the on-coming lane to miss the guy, but he hit our passenger side rear fender and tire. We careened back across our lane, down a steep embankment into the bar ditch and into the fence (didn't hurt the fence). No one was hurt, our vehicles are drivable. We never met the other guy because he told by-standers that we hit him, his bumper wasn't damaged that bad, and then he left- didn't give us his info, we didn't even get his license tag number.

We are mad. We are shaken. My truck is damaged. We are not harmed. We are lucky.

I keep thinking of how other things could have changed the outcome. If we had gone back to the house to get my ring. If there had been someone in front of us at McDonald's or at the bank. If we hadn't gone to McDonald's or the bank. If we'd driven slower or faster. Then again, if all of these had happened, someone else may have been in a wreck with a worse outcome.

Like I said, we are not harmed.

Scott and I were very lucky. It could have gone so many different ways, I don't even want to think about it. The rest of the journey was stressful. Dark came way too soon as we traveled through the Texas Hill country. We were tired, nervous, and ready to get off the road. Later that night, we just laid together in silence, holding hands, counting our blessings. If was a great reminder that we have each other.

The rest of the weekend with my family was a joyous one. What's not to love about 3 two year olds running around, great thanksgiving food, old stories and a hot tub in the middle of a cow pasture??

Silver linings? 1. We drive more cautiously and are much more aware of other drivers on the road. 2. CTVH is examining the insurance policy. 3. No one was hurt. 4. This is just one more experience that has brought Scott and I closer together- looking forward to may more of those!

Married Life

And the other, written on September 2, 2009:

"A home without a man in it? It gets a little museum-ish. Not bad. Beautiful, and very very very still. Stewarded only by a woman, objects, life, can get wierd to the touch, overly pristine."

~ Heather Stellers, from "O, the Oprah Magazine", article How Many Coffee Dates Does it Take to Find the One?

I was reading this article and read this statement. We've (more like I've) been trying to adjust to living with a boy- the three changes of clothes he goes through in a day- the way he gets a new cup every single time he gets a drink- the mail that gets opened and then left in pell-mell fasion on the coffee table- how he brings home some change of clothes or item once a day from his parents house (no, he hasn't moved in all the way yet) - and then trying to put things away after him... It's exhausting.

After reading these few statements I realized- I've been trying to fit him into my world, trying to arrange him into my space. It's not my space, it's our space, together. And he's not trying to work around me, he's just being himself. We're both just being ourselves. His style is more laid back- mine has to have everything in order before I go to bed or leave the house. Our house. Our home.

My old house was "pristine", organized, spotless, exactly the way I wanted it. But cold, now I realize it was cold. It in no way had the warmth that my new house does- our new home- with dirty cups and laundry from my husband that works so hard from sun-up to sun-down. The home where I come home and can't wait to fix dinner because my husband will be home soon- home to me-

*sigh*

Back-Blog Numero Uno

I promised to post my other numerous entries (okay, two) on this blog. Here's number one, written on Friday, August 21, 2009:

Okay, I'm new at this blogging thing, so we'll see how it goes, but I am so overwhelmed by the amazing bond that is holy matrimony that I need an outlet. This may as well be it!

It seems that each time Scott and I have gone through some phase of our relationship it has brought us so much closer. Each fight, each challenge in each other's life, each heartache, each time we could rejoice with each other. Getting engaged was so completely consuming, wholly satisfying, and exciting- we became a whole new unit together. I didn't have a clue that the actual act of getting married and moving in together would be so much more bonding- I guess I thought we'd just continue to be ourselves but we'd get to live together.

I was shockingly suprized and delighted to find out it was so much more. It's indescribable: the love I feel for this man and the love I KNOW he has for me is overwhelming- in a great way! I KNOW that this is God's will for our lives- to enter into marriage by HIS rules and abide by HIS guidelines. Our pre-marital counseling by David, Judy, and Jon was so encouraging- David outlined God's plan for marriage, the pitfalls newlyweds fall into, the red flags in relationships, and how to recognize how to show love and affection toward one another. We got in the truck and just smiled at each other because we had talked over 90% fo what they had told us and we were absolutely certain that we were doing right in God's eyes.

I know there are skeptics out there that will tell me we're still in the "honeymoon phase" and that it only goes downhill from here, but I know in my heart that what God has joined together, no man can part. As long as we keep God as our center focus and continue to follow HIS plan, we will do just fine. I can't wait to learn to love this man more and to begin our life together.

Scott's gift to me on our wedding day was perfect: a new study bible with my name on it- it made everything real to me and reassured me that we were on the right track!!!

Finally...

Hmmm... Well, I probably should have started this a long time ago, either when I started my job as a vet, or when we got engaged, or when we got married. Not that we really have much interesting going on- now we're just an old married couple settled into a routine. For now, this blog will exist to jot down funny day to day occurances, great vet stories, and to document our first year of marriage. I did have a few blog entries on my myspace page since we've been married, so I may back-blog them (can you do that?) to get a more complete picture of our life post wedding. Hope you enjoy!